Crazy calls

Just when you think you've seen everything a new experience comes along to "shake you up". And I mean that literally! So we respond to unconscious/unresponsive call which can sometimes mean cardiac arrest. We gearing ourselves up for maximum effort and arrive on location to find a fully conscious patient who denies any complaint. Family assures us that the patient was not breathing and had no pulse; and this time the family seems reputable with their knowledge. A little assessment and a little convincing and the patient is loaded up in the ambulance. Not a few minutes later the patient experiences a pacemaker failure. No major physical symptoms but the heart rhythm is a major abnormal rhythm which is a couple steps away from death.

Now as if this wasn't interesting enough, right? Suddenly the ambulance starts bucking like the proverbial bronco. WTF? The patient complains how awful the ride is and I quote "They shouldn't allow these on the road!" I'm bouncing around so violently that I can barely administer care, my boobs are being whiplashed (not fun!) and I feel a part of my spinal column in my neck jar badly! I realize that not only is this bad professionally but I'm minutes away from a compression fracture in one of my vertebrae.

So I get on the radio and make an executive decision. Another unit nearby is in service and I have them meet us down the road and we quickly switch the patient and necessary equipment into the functioning unit and skeedatle onto the hospital. Which was a really good decision because the patient became severely altered a few minutes later, we started heart pacing but unconsciousness soon followed and the patient was intubated later at the hospital.

Our malfunctioning truck showed up at the hospital about 10 minutes after us. The air ride shock system failed in our usual truck which creates a very, VERY, rough ride!

Early the next morning we're called for the flu, of course! Upon arrival we load the patient on the stretcher and the patient's spouse demands that a blanket is used to cover the patient who is already, red faced, hot to the touch from fever and bundled in a winter coat. We find out that the patient had stopped taking Tylenol early that day because they were on Tamiflu now (Hint, tamiflu DOESN'T treat fevers just helps kill off the virus causing the flu but nothing for the symptoms, der!) No Tylenol + lots of blankets creating more natural insulation = high fever which is what the patient had 103+ and why they called 911.

I attempt to explain to the spouse that the patient definitely does not need a blanket and that a few minutes of cold air will do the patient lots of good. I try to explain basic science of heat+insulation and the spouse says to me, "Use a blanket! I read an article and....blah, blah" at this point between my sleep deprived zombie state and my utter disregard for his insane advice and decided to shut up, turn away and leave before I strangled him; meanwhile the spouse is still trying to argue with me and repeats behind me "I read an article that said...."

I'm sorry! My paramedic experience trumps your stupid article! And if you know so much:

A) why does your spouse have such a high fever
B) why did you call 911 since you've got it handled

You only called 911 so you wouldn't have to drive and your spouse could be coddled since we're (afterall) morons compared to your EXTENSIVE medical knowledge.

ARGH! BTW, we dropped the spouse off in the waiting room per the hospital direction because there's no cure for the flu!

I'm riding the Artife Crazy Train this weekend!

I'm riding the Artfire Crazy Train Promotion this weekend! Here are a few of a new pieces I've been working on this week from the gorgeous gems I purchased from the Houston Gem show last weekend. I'm in the process of listing them in my Artfire shop today; rainbow moonstone, mystic quartz and lemon quartz to list the ones pictured. These will be a part of my Feathered Elegance line and I'll be taking them to the Gingerbread Market tomorrow so if you like them you'd better act fast cause they might be gone tomorrow!

Crazy numbers in my jungle

I'm finally starting to get some of my stamina and stride back from this insane year of medical issues. You know when you think you're functioning normally, you think "yeah I'm doing okay, maybe not great but I'm hanging on to my life." I laugh in the face of past perceived lucidity!

This week two things happened that made me realized just how fubared my life has been this year from my earlier medical problems. I sat down to balance my check book and realize that there is over $2000 missing from my account. Holy Mother of God and WTF!!!! How the hell did this happen and why did I not notice before now??????

Long story short - I go back to the beginning of '09 and check every entry, every penny. I realize that I had moved that large amount to my savings at one point and forgot to enter it so that wasn't really gone. whew! However, starting around the time of my major bleeding and the accompanying brain fog my check book become rather - weird. I'm normally very meticulous about my money. It's not that money is all that important to me in theory but where it is and where it's going is important. It's a tool and it damn well better be working full time for me!

Well, my basic arithmetic became very, very wrong, I entered deposits and withdrawals that apparently never existed. The entries that were there were correct but everything else was really screwed up. It's a good thing I wasn't on the ambulance during that time because who knows what the hell I would have done and not realized it.

Also, my usual chores are trimming and landscaping while my husband does the mowing and edging. Since I hadn't been able to do that for awhile and this was the first week that I had both the energy and the lack of a headache; I decided to tackle the job.

Holy crap! The climbing roses in the backyard were staging a coup on the lantana, the plumeria tree, the bbq smoker, the patio roof and the back door. I hadn't been in the back yard for a couple of weeks so I was quite surprised to notice that as soon as I stepped outside the door I was confronted by a large, thorny, reaching rose branch. Kind in mind that the rose bush is 10 feet away. I schooled that bush with my combat trimmers and leather gloves and am happy to report that it is now back to a modest rose bush.

Both of these things made me realize just how blitzed I've been for the past several months. Not that I could help it. As my mom said: "Honey, you're in survival mode right now." Boy, was she right!